A few days ago, I found myself sitting in bed with a half eaten baguette on my bedside table, two empty packets of Cadbury's Fingers (other fingers are available), and half a packet of biscuits.
It was honestly a toss-up at this point whether I felt more miserable before I started eating all these or after I'd finished. I had not felt so low in a long time, I wouldn't say depressed, more really, REALLY sad, so I knew that all I had been doing was emotionally eating all day; I wasn't expecting the food to make me feel any better, but scarf it I did.
You see, ordinarily these days I'd have gone out and done something else. Two weeks before this I'd got into running using a great little app I found for my phone called ZombiesRun 5k and was beginning to get the hang of it after a few really fun little training sessions - never in a million years did I think that running would ever be my thing - but seriously, stick some zombies and a 'computer game' style element in a fitness regime and it's an instant hit for me! Unfortunately my nephews had, that same week, also commandeered me into playing a game of football with them in the park - which meant that I buggered up a ligament in my knee and have been 'resting' ever since. This was only two weeks ago, but it feels like a lifetime and set back one of my goals for my time off since redundancy!
I'm not annoyed at myself for emotional eating, and I don't feel guilty - hey, even after 3 years I'm still aware I'm battling an old habit of binge eating when I feel low - and I also know that part of the reason I felt bad was the inability to walk gently, even for as little as 10 minutes, without increasing the pain in my knee.
I guess the reason for this post is that, even with a body-positive attitude and a good relationship with food, you can still have your moments of weakness, but that's OK.
It's OK.
Wednesday 6 May 2015
Wednesday 14 August 2013
Dating & Dresses
Right, I have to admit to feeling a little smug at the moment, as I received a few compliments for the dress below that I happened to wear on a date last week!
There are several reasons for the smugness, not least that the compliments mentioned were from my date. The dress made me feel exceptionally girly like I have NEVER felt before in my life, it cost me a WHOPPING £5.20 (inc. P&P) off Ebay (yeah, I was ripped off, right?) and although I admit to being a little nervous (I was expecting it to turn out like the Karen Millen dress disaster I ordered at the same time) it turned out to be beautiful.
The only downside I can mention to this is that the neckline of the dress is very low, and has a slight tendency to gape a little at the front showing a glimpse of bra. Naturally this wasn't the look I was going for on the date, and unfortunately I had to make do with using a hair-grip to attach the inside of the neckline to my bra to stop it, as I had no safety pins to hand. I think I'll be buying some in future! Other than that, the fit was beautiful around the waistline and the skirt was beautifully floaty!
The other downside of the dress is that I kind of feel like I've set a precedent, and with another date being arranged I now have to decide what to wear for that! Somehow, jeans and a t-shirt just don't seem to cut it any more *sigh*.
ST x
 |
| Dress: Etam via E-bay, Necklace: Can't remember, Shoes: Ebay |
There are several reasons for the smugness, not least that the compliments mentioned were from my date. The dress made me feel exceptionally girly like I have NEVER felt before in my life, it cost me a WHOPPING £5.20 (inc. P&P) off Ebay (yeah, I was ripped off, right?) and although I admit to being a little nervous (I was expecting it to turn out like the Karen Millen dress disaster I ordered at the same time) it turned out to be beautiful.
The only downside I can mention to this is that the neckline of the dress is very low, and has a slight tendency to gape a little at the front showing a glimpse of bra. Naturally this wasn't the look I was going for on the date, and unfortunately I had to make do with using a hair-grip to attach the inside of the neckline to my bra to stop it, as I had no safety pins to hand. I think I'll be buying some in future! Other than that, the fit was beautiful around the waistline and the skirt was beautifully floaty!
The other downside of the dress is that I kind of feel like I've set a precedent, and with another date being arranged I now have to decide what to wear for that! Somehow, jeans and a t-shirt just don't seem to cut it any more *sigh*.
ST x
Monday 5 August 2013
Life Wisdom from Girl Code [from BuzzFeed]
Good grief, BuzzFeed have done it again! Well, OK, the ladies at Girl Code have done it again - seriously, , if it's the last thing you look at on the internet, EVER, check this out:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/hnigatu/24-important-pieces-of-life-wisdom-from-the-ladies-of-girl-c
I'm not 100% sure what this program is all about, but from the BF piece I'm gathering it's a bit like the American version of Grumpy Old Men (remember that?) but for the average 20/30 something. Broaching subjects from sex-with-the-ex, to dieting, this selection of gifs had me in stitches!
Favourite quote:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/hnigatu/24-important-pieces-of-life-wisdom-from-the-ladies-of-girl-c
I'm not 100% sure what this program is all about, but from the BF piece I'm gathering it's a bit like the American version of Grumpy Old Men (remember that?) but for the average 20/30 something. Broaching subjects from sex-with-the-ex, to dieting, this selection of gifs had me in stitches!
Favourite quote:
"It's good to be with other people that do the same thing as you
and bond with them and know you're not a complete weirdo"
ST x
Friday 2 August 2013
Women, Tattoos and the Internet
OK, this is my first post on this type of subject, so be nice!
I have been looking through the internet a LOT recently, to find some inspiration for numerous tattoos that I am considering getting throughout the course of... well, my life, really. I have also been reading some powerful blog posts and getting an idea of things from a feminist perspective.
In doing both, I have noticed that a lot of professional shots of tattooed women on the net are highly sexual. I get it, that there are tattoos women have that are in places that standard clothing will cover up, and when proudly displaying someone's ink you want to show as much of the artwork as possible.
However. Is it really necessary to put them in such alluring poses, against walls, on beds, some with ridiculously high pleaser-heels, and pouty expressions reminiscent of page 3? Yes, a back tattoo more than likely will require the owner to go bra-less for a photo, however it does not follow that, if female, she needs to be wearing skimpy knickers - a pair of jeans will do just fine!
Google the term "tattooed men" and the story is a little difference (yeah people, I said a little, ok!?) Most of the pictures are of men in poses that would not be out of place in a clothing magazine. Naturally there are a lot of 'shirt off' sites (like I said, if that's where the ink is...) but the images seem to be a little more conservative. There are lots of shots of men bearing back tattoos, but very few include a view below the waist.
But, let's not do the internet a complete injustice, there are a few pictures of men in some VERY provocative poses, but the quantity I'd say less than half that of the female equivalent.
Tattoos are sexy, but are we celebrating the art of the ink, or the body they're attached to?
Whether we are celebrating the body, or the ink, the question is why is there such a discrepancy in how the subjects are depicted?
ST x
I have been looking through the internet a LOT recently, to find some inspiration for numerous tattoos that I am considering getting throughout the course of... well, my life, really. I have also been reading some powerful blog posts and getting an idea of things from a feminist perspective.
In doing both, I have noticed that a lot of professional shots of tattooed women on the net are highly sexual. I get it, that there are tattoos women have that are in places that standard clothing will cover up, and when proudly displaying someone's ink you want to show as much of the artwork as possible.
However. Is it really necessary to put them in such alluring poses, against walls, on beds, some with ridiculously high pleaser-heels, and pouty expressions reminiscent of page 3? Yes, a back tattoo more than likely will require the owner to go bra-less for a photo, however it does not follow that, if female, she needs to be wearing skimpy knickers - a pair of jeans will do just fine!
Google the term "tattooed men" and the story is a little difference (yeah people, I said a little, ok!?) Most of the pictures are of men in poses that would not be out of place in a clothing magazine. Naturally there are a lot of 'shirt off' sites (like I said, if that's where the ink is...) but the images seem to be a little more conservative. There are lots of shots of men bearing back tattoos, but very few include a view below the waist.
But, let's not do the internet a complete injustice, there are a few pictures of men in some VERY provocative poses, but the quantity I'd say less than half that of the female equivalent.
Tattoos are sexy, but are we celebrating the art of the ink, or the body they're attached to?
Whether we are celebrating the body, or the ink, the question is why is there such a discrepancy in how the subjects are depicted?
ST x
Friday 26 July 2013
Warwick Folk Festival
Well, what started innocently enough as agreeing to a few sets with my local Samba group at the WFF this weekend, has now turned into a camp-over (not the sappy hand-gesture type, although I did over-use this joke a bit last night at rehearsal).
This is great, I've had my tent for nearly 3 years and never used it, and I've decided to forgo my holiday to Devon for rather boring, "logical" reasons that I won't go in to here!
Not so great - I have nothing to wear!
No, no, no. I mean this sincerely, all the clothes in my wardrobe are either winter-warmth, or massive, or in the case of my "new-to-me" summer dress (recent charity shop purchase) completely see-through and in need of an emergency trip to Marks & Spencers for a slip (yes, yes I know).
Pyjamas?! In this heat, and sharing a tent with someone I've only known briefly for a few months! My god, what do I do?
Mild panic-rant out of the way, thankfully it's only for one night so I'm sure I'll work something out.
ST x
This is great, I've had my tent for nearly 3 years and never used it, and I've decided to forgo my holiday to Devon for rather boring, "logical" reasons that I won't go in to here!
Not so great - I have nothing to wear!
No, no, no. I mean this sincerely, all the clothes in my wardrobe are either winter-warmth, or massive, or in the case of my "new-to-me" summer dress (recent charity shop purchase) completely see-through and in need of an emergency trip to Marks & Spencers for a slip (yes, yes I know).
Pyjamas?! In this heat, and sharing a tent with someone I've only known briefly for a few months! My god, what do I do?
Mild panic-rant out of the way, thankfully it's only for one night so I'm sure I'll work something out.
ST x
Wednesday 24 July 2013
The Hanger-on...
So recently, I started looking for another job, and when I scored a few interviews I had a mild panic that I had absolutely nothing to wear. Then I realised that I still had this gem of a grey pencil skirt from Pilot, that I'd had in my wardrobe for, oh I don't know, decades!
The strange thing about this is, that I bought this skirt in a sale/charity shop (hey, it's been that long I honestly can't remember) over 10 years ago, and it never really fitted me properly - but for some reason I never thought to give it to charity, or sell it at all despite the numerous times I've "emptied out" my wardrobe and drawers!
Ten years later, the even stranger thing, is that as a size 10, this skirt (a size 14 on the label) is now only just slightly big on me, but hey ho. Interviews are over, I have the job, and better yet I still have a perfectly wearable skirt for work now!
It must be fate!
The strange thing about this is, that I bought this skirt in a sale/charity shop (hey, it's been that long I honestly can't remember) over 10 years ago, and it never really fitted me properly - but for some reason I never thought to give it to charity, or sell it at all despite the numerous times I've "emptied out" my wardrobe and drawers!
Ten years later, the even stranger thing, is that as a size 10, this skirt (a size 14 on the label) is now only just slightly big on me, but hey ho. Interviews are over, I have the job, and better yet I still have a perfectly wearable skirt for work now!
It must be fate!
Wednesday 10 July 2013
Dustin Hoffman - Tootsie and Self Image
I will put it out there that I've never seen the film Tootsie, but after being pointed in the direction of the below link by This is My Body Project (who do great work on promoting positive body image) it is now firmly on my "To Watch" list.
http://www.upworthy.com/dustin-hoffman-breaks-down-crying-explaining-something-that-every-woman-sadly-already-experienced-3?g=2
In this interview, Hoffman speaks frankly about the need to look like a "proper" woman, not a man in drag or overtly strange, or noteworthy in any way. He also speaks openly of his disappointment when he was shown the finished product, when he realised that he didn't look anything like what society had instilled in him as the image of a "beautiful woman" and was told there was nothing that could be done about it.
Dustin's reaction to his realisation that this feeling of disappointment, sadness, and unworthiness was something that most women tend to go through on a daily basis, is what made me want to give this man the biggest hug EVER. I cannot put this in to words, but the link shows it all.
We are ALL beautiful, interesting, fabulous wo(men) in our own right, no matter what shell we reside in. It's about time we, and society, started believing that. I hope that more people (not just men!) come to the same conclusion that Dustin did, that
Dustin, I salute you!
ST x
Now go and tell yourself you're AWESOME!
http://www.upworthy.com/dustin-hoffman-breaks-down-crying-explaining-something-that-every-woman-sadly-already-experienced-3?g=2
In this interview, Hoffman speaks frankly about the need to look like a "proper" woman, not a man in drag or overtly strange, or noteworthy in any way. He also speaks openly of his disappointment when he was shown the finished product, when he realised that he didn't look anything like what society had instilled in him as the image of a "beautiful woman" and was told there was nothing that could be done about it.
Dustin's reaction to his realisation that this feeling of disappointment, sadness, and unworthiness was something that most women tend to go through on a daily basis, is what made me want to give this man the biggest hug EVER. I cannot put this in to words, but the link shows it all.
We are ALL beautiful, interesting, fabulous wo(men) in our own right, no matter what shell we reside in. It's about time we, and society, started believing that. I hope that more people (not just men!) come to the same conclusion that Dustin did, that
ALL people are created INTERESTING!
Dustin, I salute you!
ST x
Now go and tell yourself you're AWESOME!
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